JustDad.Blog

A personal post from Just a Mom (my wife)

Go Back
God said “Go Back to what you once did”

Life has been so full of blessings in the last decade. So many blessing that I could not begin to list they all. From provision, protection, multiplication, healing, and presence. God has done so many good things and I thank him so much for bringing to life dreams and vision that my family has had since childhood. We are truly living in a blessed season. And yet I have begun to feel the pressure of life. I feel distance forming between my most beloved and my heart. Kids, weddings, moving, job changes, house buying, illness, pets, and so many other blessings have become almost all consuming. So much time spent living life I had forgotten to spend time with the one breathing into that very life. I came to God in desperation, no words just a broken heart seeking his presence and he said “Go back to what you once did when I was closest to you.” So I went on a mental search for that closeness and I found it. I remembered the moments he was closest, when all I had was God and myself. I remembered the prayer I used to pray in that season that I had for some reason stopped praying. I found the music I listened to that I had moved on from. And I remembered that this season of closeness was right before the abundant blessings entered my life. This season of being near to God was the precursor to the blessing boom that was to come in the next six years. So I started praying that prayer again. I started singing those songs again. And to my joy the closeness is returning. The space is being created for more and more of his presence. And as I reread my journals, continue praying those prayers, and sing those songs I am being hit with one realization after another. The last memory I have of this song was when I was praying for X and now I have X. When I was last praying this prayer I was asking God to show up in this way and look at how amazing he is! He showed up and outdid my wildest dream. And as I find those ebenezer stones I am reminded that God has not been distant from me even when I felt overwhelmed by life God was blessing me, providing for me, and exceeding my dreams. So if you are feeling distant from the God you once felt was so close. I would encourage you to go back and you may just find that he has been closer to you than you think.